“Lord, how much is enough?” I swallowed against the lump in my throat. For three years or so iritis had attacked my eyes, but this year the inflammation had spread, affecting my back and other joints, finally resulting in the diagnosis of ankylosing spondlytlits, a degenerative auto-immune disease. As tasks I once performed with with ease—cooking cleaning, teaching my kids, driving, even typing—became a chore or close to impossible—I grieved the loss of normalcy, and struggled with my increased dependence on others. Recent aggressive treatments with severe side effects had further debilitated me.  

“Lord, what’s next on this path? Well, maybe I don’t want to know,” I sighed and slumped against the sofa. As my husband lit the Advent candles and the rest of the family gathered around for devotions, I closed my eyes and gave myself up to the raging question in my mind: “Why, Lord, why?”

She emerged on the stage to a standing ovation. Within seconds, her rich soprano had soared above the applause. I sank into the chair and gave myself up to the beauty of the music of of Sandi Patty, winner of 39 Dove Awards, five Grammy Awards, and four Billboard Music Awards.

For the next few hours, the familiar melodies and words flowed over me. I reveled in the atmosphere of worship where the Giver of the musical talent was more center stage than the singers.  

But when she and Larnelle Harris sang my absolute favorite of all time, “He’s More than Wonderful,” my tears fell unchecked. Though those lyrics had once captivated me as a teenager, that night at the concert, the words had never been more meaningful. The bumps and curves I’ve encountered along this path we call Life over the past thirty years have tested the truth of those words. Though the agony of seeing a loved one suffer through cancer, the angst of an uncertain pregnancy, the silent pain of unspoken loss and the ache of a degenerative disease may sometimes cause me to wonder where He is, He’s never let go of my hand. His promises  are sure, as His Father’s heart overflows with a deep, everlasting love that surrounds me no matter what. I’m never too broken for Him to mend nor is there any hurt so deep He cannot soothe. 

If you'd like to, you can watch "More than Wonderful,"Sandi's duet with Larnelle Harris at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6CcebZCl_DM